Tag Archives: Laura Lee Rose

How to build a healthy employee relationship

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Whether you are a small business owner or head of a corporate department, building healthy employee relationships is much like building any relationship.  Read on for some quick building blocks for a strong employer/employee foundation.
Some significant tools are:
1) Good and open communications
2) Avoiding blame or defensiveness (don’t take anything personally)
3) Don’t make assumptions (avoid judging others)
4) Incorporate aspects of coaching and mentoring (lead by outstanding example)
Key phrases to incorporate:
Someone’s performance level is dropping and they are constantly late and/or missing important meetings:
Review the previous agreement or understanding:
“John, I need help on something. Because this is a small company and we’re working hard to make it a success, I need all my staff to be working effectively and efficiently. When I first hired you, we agreed that the work-day would start promptly at 8:30am – 5:00pm (with 1 hour for lunch at 12:00). Does that match your memory?”
“yes”
Review the reason behind the rule or agreement:
“Great. The reason I need those time blocks is so that I can schedule the proper staff meetings, conference calls, project planning and schedules within those allotted blocks. With those agreements in place, I can depend upon my full staff available during those blocks. This allows the department to function seamlessly without the overhead of micromanaging and time-cards. Have I held up to my commitment to only schedule work-related activities during those hours?”
“yes”
State your observations in a non-judgmental tone:
“Great. In regards to this specific area, I have noticed that you have not be attending our staff meetings and have been arriving late and leaving earlier. This has been a recent occurrence, maybe 2 weeks. Is there something outside of the office that is affecting your ability be fully available during the regular work hours? Something that just recently happened?”
Listen with an open mind:
At this point you might discover that your employee is going through something temporary (either in or out of the office). For example: he/she may be going through a divorce and is struggling with child custody issues. It might simply be a matter figuring out the new child-drop-off patterns or resolving some additional child-care arrangements.
Come up with a plan that accomplishes both your and their needs:
In this example, it could simply be a matter of allowing the employee to work from home on the days they are responsible for their children. Or shifting the meetings that they are critical/responsible for — later in the day/morning. Or recording the staff meetings for people to review later.
Bottom line: A healthy employee relationship is not much different from any personal or business relationship. It takes compassion without compromising your individual or business goals, mission or vision. Majority of the time, there is a solution that uplifts both sides.

Work is getting too hard, but you enjoy the job….what do you do?

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This is Laura Lee Rose, business and success coach that specializes in time management, career management and work/life balance strategies.   Recently I received the questions: “Work is getting too hard, but I enjoy the job.  What should I do? Should I stick it out or leave?”

Although I don’t know enough about this particular situation to answer in detail — I do know that if you don’t do something different, things will get worse.

On the other hand, I believe you can have it all.   Here are some tips to experiment with:

  1.  Clearly articulate what you really like about your current position.
  2. Find ways to increase your focus on those aspects that you enjoy.
  3. Find ways to delegate and train others on the tasks that are not aligned with your individual career goals.
  4. Acknowledge that the MUST DO items will always get done (otherwise they are not really MUST DO items). Also acknowledge that you can’t do everything. You can only do your best.
  5. If some of those “MUST DO” items are not aligned with your individual career goals, be transparent with your manager.  Express that you want to always give your best.  And you are unable to do your quality best on this particular item.
  6.  Be transparent with co-workers and managers on what you are working on and what you are not currently working on. Be transparent on (and realistic about)  when you will get to things, and what you are prioritizing very low. If they feel that the things you are not working on are important — it will get assigned to someone else. If it doesn’t get assigned to someone else — then it’s not that important. (See Rule 4).

Read Don Ruiz’s The Four Agreements  (quick summary below):

  1. Be impeccable with your word (Say way you mean, and do what you say)
  2. Don’t take anything personally
  3. Don’t assume or judge
  4. Always do your best.

How to easily handle a co-worker who blame others

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Have you ever been a target of  undeserved blame?  Do you know someone that deflects his/her responsibility for the problem by putting the spotlight on someone else?
What’s the best way to handle these situations?  Do you fight fire with fire?  Or do you fight fire with water?
An effective and professional way to  handle co-workers who blame others is to simply ignore them. Stay focused on what is going to assist the team in the long run. Put the spotlight back on what will get your team moving forward.
Simply focus on two things:
1) Where you are right now.
2) Where you want to actually be.
Although you can do little to change how others act, the ‘blame game” is usually initiated as a defense strategy.  Eliminating the need to defend and judge will eliminate the need to blame others.
Avoiding the blame game is easy if you are fully focused on the solution (versus the problem).
If the co-worker is making you the center of attention, use that spotlight to focus on the solution. 
For example:.
“While I do not agree with how this issue occurred, Gary is right about one thing. I do want to take some responsibility for fixing it. Gang – we are where we are. What do we need to do right now to get us back on the right track”.

Want to be a good leader? Be a good teacher.

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– When the student is ready, the teach will appear
Buddist Proverb

In my GoTo Academy: Soft Skills Tools for the GoTo Professional continuous online coaching series, we cover real-life professional dilemmas such as the below.
If you are interested in more training in these areas, please signup for the continuing online coaching series.
Whether you are leading in the office, home or life, it’s much like teaching.
A good teacher provides only the answers that the student is asking.  If the teacher’s goals is to  cover all the information in their syllabus to accomplish the semester’s goal, then their class plan will be different than if their goal was to help the student understand the significant concepts of the material.  You can see how the different emphasis and goals might change the way the teacher approaches the task.

Same with the work force and life.
As a leader in the work force, community or life in general, you can decide what type of leader you want to be.
Do you want your focus to be “the execution of a series of pre-planned tasks and directives” or will your focus be on the high-level mission and vision (allowing for the natural deviation of specific tasks to accomplish the essence of the high-level vision)?  Both goals are very appropriate.  Both goals will have different approaches.

A good teacher modifies their pace to their student’s absorption rate or rate of understanding.  If the teach gets too far ahead of the student, the student will be lost and frustrated.  If the teach falls too far behind the student, the student will get bored and distracted with other things to fill in the empty space.

Same with leading.  A good leader sets his/her pace to the team’s movements.  In a funny way, the good leader is actually following the team.  If the leader leads too far ahead, the team will be pushed, pulled and jerked into compliance.  Although the tasks might be executed on time, they may be lacking of quality and eloquence.  If the leader leads to slowly, the team is apt to either complete the task on their own in a different direction (and away from the overall vision) or get distracted to complete something else (delaying the delivery of this project).

Becoming a good leader (like becoming a good teacher) takes time, practice and patience with oneself and others.  It’s not an over night skill.  Be gentle with yourself and with others, and everything will come together at the right time.

If you are interested in knowing how to take these leadership concepts into the professional environment, please sign up for my professional and career management (free) newsletter at
or cut/paste this into your browser: http://eepurl.com/cZ9_-/
Feel free to share this newsletter with your family, friends and colleagues. My business relies on satisfied clients as the primary source of new business, and your referrals are both welcome and most sincerely appreciated!

Enjoy!

Warmly,
Laura Lee Rose
We talk more about how to incorporate this philosophy into the real-world professional environment in my on-line coaching academy series.  <check out our GoTo Academy: Soft Skills Tools for the GoTo Professional>

Feel free to share this newsletter with your family, friends and colleagues. My business relies on satisfied clients as the primary source of new business, and your referrals are both welcome and most sincerely appreciated!

Got a Problem?

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Got Pain?

In my GoTo Academy: Soft Skills Tools for the GoTo Professional continuous online coaching series, I go into the different tools, usage, and usage etiquette in detail.
If you are interested in more training in these areas, please signup for the continuing online coaching series.

I don’t often get headaches, but on Wednesday, I had a duzy.
I spent most of the morning and afternoon trying to figure out why I had this headache and what type it was:
  • Was I struggling with something with my business?
  • Was something out of alignment?
  • Was I just reacting to the high-low pressures of the upcoming summer storms?
  • Is my body just telling me to shut-down for awhile?
  • Should I focus and mediate this headache away?
  • Lay down for awhile?  (since I can’t seem to concentrate anyways)
  • Was this something people call a migraine?
  • Was it a sinus headache?
Finally it got so distracting that I could not move my head without pain. So — late afternoon, I decided to take a trip to the drug store and get some headache-powder. The Goody headache powder (not recommending it — just stating that it works for me) has always works for me. But by the time I  entered the drug store — I could not remember why I was there!
“This damn headache — it’s so distracting. Oh-yeah…. I’m here because of the headache.”
Within 5 minutes of taking the powder — I was feeling much better.  I can’t honestly tell you when it completely when away — because my attention was no longer on the headache.  But it is easy to see how we can get caught up and distracted in the “pain” that we don’t take the action to remove it.  I often use the term “we’re postponing the cure”. We’re slowing ourselves down.

I spent most of the day wondering “why I had a headache” (thinking about it) — instead of actually doing something about it. I already knew Goody would help — yet it wasn’t until late afternoon that I decided to go to the store and get it. I spent most of my day focused on the problem and not the solution ……

We talk more about how to incorporate this philosophy into the real-world professional environment in my on-line coaching academy series.  <check out our GoTo Academy: Soft Skills Tools for the GoTo Professional>
Feel free to share this newsletter with your family, friends and colleagues. My business relies on satisfied clients as the primary source of new business, and your referrals are both welcome and most sincerely appreciated!

How many mistakes do you want to make today?

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How many mistakes do you want to make today? – Find out the secret to making zero mistakes this week, month and year.  Read on….

In my GoTo Academy: Soft Skills Tools for the GoTo Professional continuous online coaching series, we cover real-life professional dilemmas such as the below.
If you are interested in more training in these areas, please signup for the continuing online coaching series.


On Tuesday afternoon, I opened an email regarding a radio broadcast of some interest to me.  Unfortunately, the radio show was set for Tuesday (today) at 11:00am.  My initial thought was: “Darn I wonder when this originally was sent.  It looked rather interesting.  It was about smart women – and I’d like to think of myself as a smart person who happens to be a woman.”

I checked the timestamp of the email, and it was originally sent Tuesday (today) at 9:00am. Having a project manager background, my next thought was: “Darn.  That was poor planning.  These smart people weren’t really setting themselves up for success on this particular event.  Oh well….maybe they will have a replay available that I can take advantage of later.”

Wednesday, I received another email stating that the broadcast would be rescheduled.   When I opened the email the note said that it was going to be rescheduled for late Sept/Oct.  There was no other news on the topic.

  This led me to wonder:

  1. Since this message was send 24 hours after the event was supposed to take place, were people left hanging?  Or did they just broadcast another program instead?
  2. Was this rescheduled because of lack of attendance?  No one called in because of the late notice?
  3. Did the guest speaker get confused? Was he being taped today – but the actual broadcast would be later?
  4. Was this rescheduled because of technical difficulties?
  5. Was this rescheduled because the guest did not show up?
  6. Was there a mix-up on the studio reservation?
  7. Will I even want to tune in late Sept/Oct?  I can’t really set aside a date/time in my calendar.

Then my mind continued with other possibilities and conspiracies.

Things certainly pop-up and take us off-course.  Since we know this up-front, how should we  professionally approach them?  Is there a creative way to turn these events into our favor?  How can we use these mishaps to actually strength our resolve and integrity of purpose?

In this small example, should we:

  1. Be a little more transparent on what happened?  Telling our audience (or email contacts) some of the details – avoids them imagining their own answers. It also shows our integrity in taking responsibility for fixing the issue.
  2. Actually provide the rescheduled date/time?  This allows people to make note and mark it in their calendar for the future tune-in.
  3. If the future date is unknown, publish the date that the air-date will be known?  Then assure your viewers that you will update them at that time with more information.
  4. Publish this new date/time in your upcoming newsletters and scheduled promotions (now)?
  5. Provide everyone a link to the  sample taped/mp3 version?  This could be a quick summary of what was going to be said on the program, which might help keep people’s interest ignited.  We could also provide an registration page that allows us to notify these particular people of additional news and offers associated with this broadcast.

Conclusion:
Do you know why SNAFU’s and missteps happen all the time? It’s because they are not actually missteps.  Things naturally just happen.  It was our unrealistic expectations that deems the event as a mishap (not the event itself). Once again, the event is merely the event.  It is our expectations that defined it a mishap or mistake.   Therefore, it’s not the ‘mistakes’ that slow us down, but how we interpret and respond to the ‘happened events’.

Homework assignment: Think of some recent mishaps at the office.  What follow-up steps can you do ‘right now’ to turn that into an advantage?

99.98% of all mistakes are actually imagined.  What’s to say that your mistake isn’t one of those imagined?  What’s to say that this event isn’t actually an opportunity for bigger and better?

We talk more about how to incorporate this philosophy into the real-world professional environment in my on-line coaching academy series.  <check out our GoTo Academy: Soft Skills Tools for the GoTo Professional>

Feel free to share this newsletter with your family, friends and colleagues. My business relies on satisfied clients as the primary source of new business, and your referrals are both welcome and most sincerely appreciated!

Office Etiquette Tips

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As a success and business coach, I find that transparency is the first defense against discomfort. At your next one-on-one meeting, openly discuss the following with your manager:
  1. Expected work hours (including your individual schedule regarding picking up children, volunteer schedule, etc).
  2. Communicate any deviation from the above plan when appropriate
  3. Handling business travel and expenses:  Ask your manager what is the normal expense procedures. If you are meeting a client, the you normally pick up the check for the client. Verify your assumptions with your manager.
  4. Personal calls can be taken at the desk if you have your own office. In shared offices or cubes, calls can be distracting for your office mates. It is not only interrupting your work time but your office mates day as well. On the other hand, some personal calls can not be avoided (and often will energize you toward higher performance at work).  Like office breaks, a personal call can keep us inspired and creative.  Just keep them short or schedule them for a conference room.
  5. Sending company-wide/department-wide emails only with your manager’s permission. Some managers would like to review these types of emails. Talk to your manager upfront, on how to handle these things.
  6. Sending/accepting a boss’ friend request on Facebook. My recommendation is to keep your personal facebook account separate from your work. If you feel uncomfortable inviting your boss into your home/life everyday (and weekend) — don’t mix the two. You may want to create a separate Facebook group for office people (in which you can include your boss). This allows you to communicate through facebook, by allowing certain groups access to work-events-messages and separate/limit other messages and activities for other friends.
  7. Buying candy/cookies from your boss’ children. If you really, really want the candy/cookies/Christmas wrap etc (and would be purchasing it from someone else anyway), supporting your boss’ children is a nice gesture. However, if you do not want the product, my recommendation is to simply apologize for not being able to purchase the candy/cookies because you already donate your maximum to your other charities. Most companies have a policy against solicitation and it’s normally improper for the boss to impose this type of pressure on his/her employees. It can also become a slippery slope, because other co-workers see you purchase the items and may start bringing their children’s various fundraising efforts to you as well. This is why most companies have a policy against solicitations by employees as well as outsiders.

Best way to correct a supervisor’s/boss’ error… in front of others.  In my experience, it is best to avoid “correcting”. Instead, ask permission to add some additional information or data to the current analysis. Your objective data will either substantiate the decision or give a new dimension to the discussion — without judgement or a negative reference.

If you have other confusing situations, please send them to LauraRose@RoseCoaching.info

Don’t miss a tip for career and time management:  <Subscribe to the Rose Coaching newsletter here>

Interested in an online coaching series?  <check out our GoTo Academy: Tools for the GoTo Guy and Gal>

If you haven’t taken advantage of your introductory time management coaching session, please contact LauraRose@RoseCoaching.info

Your mission, if you choose to accept it….

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In my GoTo Academy: Tools for the GoTo Guy and Gal class exercises, I ask my students to do the following:

  • First week, I ask my students to list three heroes (dead or alive) that they would like to meet (and why).
  • Every week thereafter,  I give my students a problem or scenario to solve or improve.
  • I then ask them to pretend to be one of their previously listed heroes.  They are to redo the previous exercise with their new mindset.

They are often surprised how their answers differed — even though their knowledge set, their environment, and their resources did not change.  They only thing they changed was their mindset or perspective.

Putting on the robe or attributes of your favorite heroes makes it easier to take that leap.

Your homework, if you choose to accept it:  When faced with a challenge, pretend to be one of your most admired mentors or Brainiacs.  What would they do?  How would they react or respond?  Pretending to be someone else makes it easier to think out of our default ‘box’ and take that leap.  And since we gravitate toward heroes that exhibit more of who we really want to be — we can’t lose.

p.s.  The best part is that no one needs to know that you are doing it.

Let me know what you think.

5 Tips for managing cultural or process change in the workplace

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 “When the student is ready, the teacher will appear”

Buddhist proverb

The most effective way to lead and mentor, is when the student is wanting or asking. An inherent problem occurs when you are mentoring or leading groups (such as in a corporation). Often times a company, division or department will adopt a new process or software life cycle method without regard to the culture or readiness of the employees. This creates a frustrating and possibly a “no-Win” position for anyone responsible for auditing or managing this process change.

Sometimes when people are having trouble with change, it is because they are not ready for the change. Forcing them in a direction that they are not ready for is more difficult than merely allowing them the time to adjust and continue to lead them in that direction. Allowing and recognizing the stages of acceptance are also important (see 10 Tips for dealing with change in the workplace for more information).

Some additional points to consider when leading folks toward a new culture, development lifecycle method or process:

  1. Acknowledge that it isn’t your responsibility to ‘force’ everyone to adapt to the change.
  2.  Share reason for the process change
  3. Celebrate even the smallest process successes.
  4. Ask for help
  5.  Lead by example

Read the full article at :

www.lauraleerose.com/5 Tips for managing process change in the workplace.pdf

Email or not to email – that is the question.

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Have any of these happened to you?

  •  An email is sent at 4:00am to tell you that the 8:00am meeting location (for the same day) has changed.
  • You are waiting for your next private student and they never show.  When you return home, you find an email send 1-hour before the class saying that they will not be able to make it.
  • You need answers to some important project answers.  You continue to send email requests without success.  Your report is late.

Email is very convenient, but it’s not the best way to communicate time sensitive information.  In all three of the above examples, email isn’t the enemy but it contributes to the problem.

Some problems with the above examples:

  • Sending the message doesn’t assure that the message is received.
  • Avoid imposing and passing along your chaotic schedule onto others.  Consider that your late notices are the results of your poor planning, not the person’s that you just passed it along to with a quick email note.  In this example, you essentially “washed-your-hands” of your responsibility for your last minute change and left it up to the other person to manage it.
  • Sometimes emails can be lost and automatically filtered into junk or spam folders.  Don’t automatically assume that they are deliberately ignoring you.
  • Not everyone has email capability strapped to their belt or in their purse.  It may be several hours or until the next day before the message is actually received.

Many times we use this method to avoid conflict or embarrassment for something we are uncomfortable saying in person.  Many times we use email to simply cross a to-do item off our list.  The mistake is that we feel that once we “send” we are done.    As you can see from the above examples, that is not always the case.  Communication is (at minimum) a two-way street.   Your initiated email or text simply doesn’t complete the circuit.

An good way to avoid a mistake with email is to:  review why you are sending this message and what you hope to accomplish with it.  What is your goal?  Is the goal for them to actually receive the message and take some type of action?  Or are you merely giving some background information or reference material for later use?

Also consider:

  •  Would you be inconvenienced if they don’t get this message?
  • Would they be inconvenienced if they didn’t get this message?
  • Are you sending this email to avoid talking to them in person?
  • Are you deliberately ignoring their request for response to avoid conflict?

None of these are very good uses of email alone.

But how does one know when it’s appropriate to send an email message and when it’s not enough?  Some things to consider is the type of message, urgency and amount of lead time available.

Some good general communication rules:

  • Provide the recipient enough lead time to actually receive and respond (at least 2 business days).   If less than 2 days, call instead.
  • If 2 days passes without a response, switch to another (more urgent) form of communication preferably a phone call or a meeting.  This way you can get your response immediately through that interaction.  Both email and text is a delayed form of communication ( i.e:  send a one-way communication and wait minutes, hours, days, weeks for a response).
  • If you are not interested in continuing the relationship, respond “I’m not interested; please remove me from your subscription list; please remove me from this project; etc”.  Ignoring their emails in hopes that they will get the message is neither considerate nor effective.  They may be giving you the benefit of the doubt and are assuming that you are not receiving the communications.   Once you have explicitly stated that you are not interested and asked for them to stop all communication, and then most reasonable people will take you off their project status list.

Conclusion:

Take the time to put yourself in the other person’s shoes.  If your positions were reversed, how you would like someone to notify you about a last moment change; how much time lead time would you like before you reschedule and rearrange your day;  how would you like the other person to deal with a difficult situation?