Office Etiquette Tips

As a success and business coach, I find that transparency is the first defense against discomfort. At your next one-on-one meeting, openly discuss the following with your manager:
  1. Expected work hours (including your individual schedule regarding picking up children, volunteer schedule, etc).
  2. Communicate any deviation from the above plan when appropriate
  3. Handling business travel and expenses:  Ask your manager what is the normal expense procedures. If you are meeting a client, the you normally pick up the check for the client. Verify your assumptions with your manager.
  4. Personal calls can be taken at the desk if you have your own office. In shared offices or cubes, calls can be distracting for your office mates. It is not only interrupting your work time but your office mates day as well. On the other hand, some personal calls can not be avoided (and often will energize you toward higher performance at work).  Like office breaks, a personal call can keep us inspired and creative.  Just keep them short or schedule them for a conference room.
  5. Sending company-wide/department-wide emails only with your manager’s permission. Some managers would like to review these types of emails. Talk to your manager upfront, on how to handle these things.
  6. Sending/accepting a boss’ friend request on Facebook. My recommendation is to keep your personal facebook account separate from your work. If you feel uncomfortable inviting your boss into your home/life everyday (and weekend) — don’t mix the two. You may want to create a separate Facebook group for office people (in which you can include your boss). This allows you to communicate through facebook, by allowing certain groups access to work-events-messages and separate/limit other messages and activities for other friends.
  7. Buying candy/cookies from your boss’ children. If you really, really want the candy/cookies/Christmas wrap etc (and would be purchasing it from someone else anyway), supporting your boss’ children is a nice gesture. However, if you do not want the product, my recommendation is to simply apologize for not being able to purchase the candy/cookies because you already donate your maximum to your other charities. Most companies have a policy against solicitation and it’s normally improper for the boss to impose this type of pressure on his/her employees. It can also become a slippery slope, because other co-workers see you purchase the items and may start bringing their children’s various fundraising efforts to you as well. This is why most companies have a policy against solicitations by employees as well as outsiders.

Best way to correct a supervisor’s/boss’ error… in front of others.  In my experience, it is best to avoid “correcting”. Instead, ask permission to add some additional information or data to the current analysis. Your objective data will either substantiate the decision or give a new dimension to the discussion — without judgement or a negative reference.

If you have other confusing situations, please send them to LauraRose@RoseCoaching.info

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Interested in an online coaching series?  <check out our GoTo Academy: Tools for the GoTo Guy and Gal>

If you haven’t taken advantage of your introductory time management coaching session, please contact LauraRose@RoseCoaching.info

Why do we interrupt each other?

 Would you like to know the following 2 secrets?
  • Why do people interrupt (or, rather, why do people who chronically interrupt do it)?
  • 3 Tips you can use to stop a constant interrupter at the office
Quick overview on ‘why’:

On the average, we speak at the rate of 125-150 words per minute. We can comprehend and listen at the rate of 600 words per minute. This means that our minds are underutilized by a factor of 4-5 when listening to others. Therefore, it’s a struggle to keep our minds on topic. Often times, we hear one or two phrases of the conversation and we jump ahead to a solution or experience that happened to us. We’re quick to share our experience and expertise before we realize that this wasn’t really the focus of conversation. Because of our boredom, we inadvertently created a tangent and separate conversation (either in our heads or out loud).

Our society also supports and encourages this lifestyle.
Not only does our minds working at a faster rate, other things are happening so fast these days. With the internet, cell phones, texting, beepers, and instant messaging – information is constantly streaming at us, for us and by us. Even our interruptions are interrupted. For instance you may be working on a task and then you get interrupted by an instance message or “online chat” by someone (or via phone call). While responding to that initial interruption, someone else enters your office. It’s situation normal. We even have a name for it: “multitasking”.

Tips:
The way you conduct yourself can greatly diminish the amount of interruptions you encounter.
1) Spell out your intentions up front.
Example: “Hey, John (the boss). Thanks for agreeing to meet me on this topic. I’m having this problem and I value your opinion on this. There are a lot of different pieces to this explanation; so please bear with me. I want to tell you the entire story. Then I want us to wrap around and get your thoughts on specific details.”
Example: “I really want to keep this meeting on schedule, so I need this meeting to be brief and to the point. The purpose of this meeting is XXX. I ask everyone’s help to keep us on target. I ask everyone for their patience and avoid interrupting each other –with one exception. I ask everyone’s permission to interrupt if I see the meeting go off topic.”
2) Value your time and others will as well.
Make use of your “Do Not Disturb” sign on your cube, phone, chat and instant message for blocks of time when you do not want to be interrupted. OR make use of “open office hours” publishing blocks of time when people can interrupt you.

Example: “Hey, Joe (co-worker). I’m in the middle of a task here. I’ll be done with this at 3:00. Let’s meet in the break room at that time to discuss your idea (or schedule a real meeting to fully discuss it).

Example: “Hey, Joe (boss). That’s a good point. I want to give that issue the proper time and focus. Because I am focused on this right project now, I can’t give it the attention that your topic deserves. Priority wise, do you want me to delay delivery on this and switch to that? Okay — I’ll be done on this by Thursday noon. Let’s schedule a longer discussion for Thursday at 2:00pm.

3) If there is a particular person that is a frequent offender (or perhaps its you), give them an additional role in the meeting. For example:

  • Ask them to be the note-taker.
  • Ask them to keep the Parking Lot list (list of important topics that were discovered but not really on the agenda).
  • Ask them to be the time-keeper

Because interruptions have become so natural, we may not even notice that we’re doing it.
Read the short article: “Interrupting is a 2-way street”

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Where does Instant Messaging and Chatting fit in the professional arena?

 

In my GoTo Academy: Soft Skill Tools for the GoTo Professional continuous online coaching series, I go into office etiquette on various real-world IT topics in detail.
If you are interested in more training in these areas,
please signup for the continuing online coaching series.

 

I agree that instant messaging is another good tool for communication. Chat and IM usage is also growing in the web-conference area. It’s a terrific tool to collect and answer questions during a presentation. I have been using the group chat functions in my many webinars and web conferences. I think it’s great for that.

 Once again, I agree with you that it’s a great tool in it’s separate uses. But I’m not 100% convinced that it’s a good alternative to email. Like any tool, IM can be misused.
In the regular office environment, Instant Messaging should be consider as “interrupting” someone for a moment for a quick FYI or interaction. It isn’t as effective for longer informative exchanges (not as effective as email, phone call or a face-to-face meeting).
Things to keep in mind when using IM:
  1. Since you can not see the person your are ‘pinging’, acknowledge that they may be in the middle of an important project, meeting, or interview. Ask them if they have time for a quick chat. Just because they are on their computer, don’t just assume they have the time to be interrupted like this. Their machine could just automatically bring up their chat window, even though they are not really available. Therefore, keep your IM short.
  2. Use a quick same-time chat to setup an official phone-call or meeting (or even to tell them that you have sent them a more detail email on the topic). Don’t try to actually conduct an impromptu one-on-one meeting using chat. Agree upon a time/date for the longer meeting, and allow them to return to what they were previously doing.
  3. Use a quick same-time IM to quickly verify information or status; but not a long explanation of said status. If your brief status update generates questions, pick up the phone (or schedule a proper meeting).
  4. 4) Instant Messaging isn’t as professional or effective a communication tool as a real phone call or face-to-face meeting — because people can not hear the refection of your voice, see your facial expression or your body language (similar to the limitations of email). Written text only covers 36% of the communicative message. The other 64% is conveyed through tone, expression and body language.
  5. IM has another drawback for medium or long-conversation uses. It is difficult to convey your entire thought without being interrupted by your co-chat-partner. People don’t realize when you are merely pausing. Therefore, they often jump-the-gun to respond to what they think you are saying (while you are pausing or gathering your thoughts). Since you were actually in mid-thought, IM introduces the opportunity for mis-direction and miscommunication.
  6. You also don’t know if the person has finished their thought or just has been momentarily distracted by something else that is currently happening in their location. This leads to disconnected and un-chronological ordered threads. Therefore, you are often responding and/or following different topics.
  7. Meetings are less effective if/when people are IM-ing others during the meeting. Your attention is no longer on purpose. (The exception is that if you actually pause the meeting to IM someone for a quick status or update that is aligned with the meeting purpose. Any off-purpose chatting is disrespectful.)
IM is a convenient professional tool to momentarily capture someone’s attention. But I’m not convinced it’s a good substitute for a phone call or person-to-person conversation. It’s also not as effective as email for longer-informational discussions. Just because it seems convenient, doesn’t mean it’s as effective as a real-person-to-person chat.
Video chats can certainly overcome many of the limitations of the IM texting. That tool is also becoming popular. Google, SKYPE, and ipads provide this capability and more computers (these days) have built-in webcams. The drawback is that you can not easily carry on the video chats in shared-office space.
I think they are all great tools. But great tools for different reasons and uses. They are great tools in their own right.  To learn more about the different tools and their most effective uses, please subscribe to the GoTo Academy: Tools for the GoTo Guy and Gal.

If you liked this tips, more can be found at www.lauraleerose.com/blog or subscribe to my weekly newsletter at http://eepurl.com/cZ9_-/

The weekly newsletter contains tips on:
1)      Time management
2)      Career maintenance
3)      Business networking
4)      Work life balance strategies

If you haven’t taken advantage of your introductory time management coaching session, please contact LauraRose@RoseCoaching.info

Your mission, if you choose to accept it….

In my GoTo Academy: Tools for the GoTo Guy and Gal class exercises, I ask my students to do the following:

  • First week, I ask my students to list three heroes (dead or alive) that they would like to meet (and why).
  • Every week thereafter,  I give my students a problem or scenario to solve or improve.
  • I then ask them to pretend to be one of their previously listed heroes.  They are to redo the previous exercise with their new mindset.

They are often surprised how their answers differed — even though their knowledge set, their environment, and their resources did not change.  They only thing they changed was their mindset or perspective.

Putting on the robe or attributes of your favorite heroes makes it easier to take that leap.

Your homework, if you choose to accept it:  When faced with a challenge, pretend to be one of your most admired mentors or Brainiacs.  What would they do?  How would they react or respond?  Pretending to be someone else makes it easier to think out of our default ‘box’ and take that leap.  And since we gravitate toward heroes that exhibit more of who we really want to be — we can’t lose.

p.s.  The best part is that no one needs to know that you are doing it.

Let me know what you think.

Effective use of Voice Mail:

Regardless of which time zones you are working with, answering machines and voice mail has become a part of everyday existence.  Unfortunately, we don’t always make use of the tool effectively.  For instance, I often receive messages like, “Laura, give me a call” without name or contact information in which to call them back.  Or they rapidly mumble the phone number with no hope of duplicating.

Or you call them at a convenient to you but you know it isn’t a convenient to them.  You want to hand-off the information (essentially getting it off your to-do list) but you know that they aren’t going to receive the message right away (because of their time zone or travel schedules).   This is fine to do, but there are some professional things to consider.  See on…

Some things to be aware of

  • State your name and number up-front to avoid running out of time at the end of the message.  Pause and repeat your contact number very slowly to allow folks to jot it down, if need be. By stating the number up-front, we avoid being cut-off at the end.   For instance: We naturally speed our speak toward the end of the message to avoid the “cut-off” phenomenon.  When we speed up, our voices often lower and we mumble  – making us difficult.   Also by placing our name and number up-front, we save them from having to hear the entire message again — just to write down our number.
  • Keep your voice clear and strong throughout the message and repeat any important numbers or ‘call to actions’.
  • If you call this person often, you don’t need to leave your contact information each time.  But if you haven’t spoken to this person in awhile, just refresh their memory.  They might have changed their phones and lost your number.  Or you may have changed your number in-between contact, etc.
  • If you know you are calling them at a bad time, tell them. For instance, “Hey, Sally.  This is Laura. Mr. Favor’s number is 555-123-4567, once again it’s 555-123-4567.    I know you are traveling today.  No need to return this call. I just know that you wanted to talk to Mr. Favor while you were in his town.  Once again Mr. Favor’s number is 555-123-4567.”  This shows Sally that you were not only sensitive to her goals, but that you were listening to her when she was sharing her travel schedule with you.  Otherwise, if you had left a message like: “Sally, I have that number for you.”; she might get flustered and mentally note (although she would be too polite to actually say it), “Gosh darn it, Laura.  I told you I would be busy and on the road today!  Now I have yet another thing to do to follow-up on this.”
  • Be explicit about any deadlines and when you will call them back (and state the reason for your call) so that they can be on the watch for your next call.  Most of the time, when you give an explicit time  when you will call back (and reason for your call), co-workers will connect with the importance of speaking with you.  They often give you a call back immediately with the information that you are requesting.  When you are vague and ambiguous about your intentions, people unconsciously dismiss the message. If you are transparent and explicit in the reason for your call, they are allowed to do some ground-work and are prepared with the answer in time for your next call.
  • Share why it’s important to them to return your call.  Put yourself in their shoes and figure out why they will want to return your call.  If you are leaving a humdrum, uninteresting or even negative message, people will find other things to delay their call-back.  If you state your intentions in the form of a win/win or exciting collaborative way, people are more likely to respond positively.  For example: “Sally,  This is Laura Lee Rose at 919-614-9029, (once again 919-614-9029).  I was thinking about your concerns over XYZ and I think I have the beginnings of a solution.  I’m excited about discussing this idea with you.  I think with some collaborative noodling, it would be a Wi/Win for everyone.  Are you available for a 20 minute call today or tomorrow? Maybe sometime between 3:00pm and 7:00pm?  If not, can you leave me three other dates and times in which we can brainstorm together?”
  • Make your message count.  Always leave a message that takes you one or two steps closer to your target goal.  For instance, if you are calling to setup a meeting, leave 3 different date/times that you are available to meet and what number they can call.  This way, when they return your call (and get your voice mail), they can say, “Yes — I am available on today at X o’clock”.  As you can see, this is much more effective than a message like, “Sally, I need to talk to you.  Give me a call, please.”  or even “Sally, I need to setup a meeting with you.”
  • If you get their voice mail and your are just leaving an FYI …. be explicit with your intentions and release their need to return your call. For example: “Hey, Sally.  This is Laura Rose. Mr. Jones’ number is 555-123-4567 (once again 555-123-4567). Mr. Jones said the delivery is expected on June 15th.  There’s no need to return this call, unless you have further questions.  I’ll be away from the office the rest of the day.  So, if you have any further questions, calling Mr. Jones directly would be more effective.”  This is much more efficient than “Hey, Sally, call me.”
  • Leave your client or co-worker uplifted by your message.  Realize that leaving a voice mail for someone requires additional work on their part.  They have to schedule time to listen to the voice mail, jot down any highlights, notes or numbers, and schedule time to return your call.  Acknowledge and value their time.  Anything you can do to release them of additional tediousness, please consider it.  For instance, “Hey, Sally.  This is Laura.  I’ll send you an email update on this, so that you don’t have to make notes.  Just letting you know that the deal is done.  Papers signed. Fax on it’s way.  I knew this was on your mind.  So now you can relax and have a glorious, care-free vacation.”
  • Although not always necessary, I have a habit of also sending a recap-email of my phone messages and telephone conversations.  This gives me a virtual paper trail of our agreements, action items and deadlines.  It’s not necessary for everything, but does come in handy many times.  Some people have more access to email than to phones and visa-versa.  Incorporating both helps assures your message is getting received and acted upon.

Using Time Zones to Your Benefit

No longer is “I’ll finish this tomorrow”  or “I’ll schedule the meeting for later this afternoon before I leave work”an acceptable business mindset.

In today’s global and international work environment, ‘Waiting until tomorrow’ can cost you and entire day of productivity.  On the other hand, I am not advocating working around the clock either.  What I am suggesting is to merely be aware of both your surroundings and those of your clients and stakeholders.
While this is difficult when you are covering several time zones at once, it is manageable if you are working with one or two time zones on a project.
Some tips:
1) For people that are 3 or more hours head of your time zone:

  • Don’t leave your day without processing their request or (providing them status).  This way they will be automatically greeted with an update and feel that you have been very responsive.
  • Don’t suggest an impromptu meeting or interview late in your afternoon.  They have already gone for the day
  • Call them the first thing in your workday.  This will give them the rest of their afternoon to comply with your request.  And you will still have time to respond to their answers before you go home for the day.
  • Be transparent in your office hours. People at your site can see when you normally arrive and leave work.  Those in other time-zones do not.  If you are not normally in the office in the afternoon, tell them that.  This tells the client that if they want a response today, they need to send in the request by a certain time each day.
  • Incorporate and acknowledge time-zone delays and buffers in your delivery schedules.  This will allow you to accommodate for the delays either by adding time to the delivery schedule or deliberately shifting the work schedule to accommodate the time zone differences..

2) For people that are 3 or more hours behind your time zone:

  • Process their requests first thing in the morning.  Because they are not in the office yet; and this gives you an opportunity to comply with their request without them waiting.  This way they are greeted with your response the moment they start-up their computer.  If you wait until the end of your day to respond, you have delayed your progress two days (they have to wait until tomorrow to work on your follow-up request).
  • Give them a lunch-time (your time zone) call with any of your requests.  If you greet them with a lunch-time call, you can interactively review the materials that you have previously sent them earlier in your morning.  This allows you to answer any of their questions and give you time to respond to any follow-up requests before you go home (at your regular time).  If you call them the moment you get to the office, you know you will be leaving a voice mail and adding another to-do item on their list to call you back.  Deliberating orchestrating a ‘voice-mail’ tag game is non-productive and frustrating for all involved.   It may seem like you are ‘trying to communicate’ — but you are actually merely delaying the interactive interchange.

**Some people actually do this on purpose because they want to deliberately avoid confrontation and extend the deadlines.  Don’t dance to this song with them.

  • Be transparent in your office hours.  People at your site can see when you normally arrive and leave work.  Those in other time-zones do not.  If you are not normally in the office in the afternoon, tell them that.  This tell the client that if they want a response today, they need to send in the request by a certain time each day.
  • Incorporate and acknowledge time-zone delays and buffers in your delivery schedules.  This will allow you to accommodate for the delays either by adding time to the delivery schedule or deliberately shifting the work schedule to accommodate the time zone differences.

Asking the right question takes skill

I had a vivid dream last night.  In this dream, a friend was very proud of her published article in a certain magazine.  She asked me to read it.  I was very excited and was looking forward to a pleasant and proud read, “Sure, where is it?”

She hands me the magazine and says, “It’s in there”.

I start thumbing through the magazine.  The type was very small, and all the articles started with the same 6 words, making it:

1)      Very difficult to read, because the type was small and in italics.

2)      Time consuming, because all the article titles started the same.

I was squinting and found myself losing interest the longer I searched.  Then my self-doubt set in.  ‘Maybe I scanned the titles too quickly?  Maybe I misread some of the titles? Maybe I’ve actually passed the article?’  So I confessed, “I can’t seem to find the article in here.”

She quickly said, “It’s in there.”

The more I searched, the more impatient I became.  “I’m not seeing it.”

She was now getting frustrated, “It’s there.  Keep looking”.

By the time I found the article on page 101, I was not in the right frame of mind to read it.  At this moment I woke up with one question in my head: “Why didn’t I ask which page her article was on, in the first place?”

Asking the right question isn’t as easy as it sounds.  First – we need to recognize that an important question needs to be asked.  Second – we need to decide what that ‘important question’ would be.

In my dream, I was so caught up in the ‘action’ of finding the article that I did not pause to recognize my mounting frustration.  Although my initial goal was to pleasantly and proudly read my friend’s published article, it mutated into merely finding the article.  By the time I actually found it, I was neither pleasant nor excited.  Even though I found the article, I didn’t read it (failed at the essence of my goal).

One recommendation is to use your emotional trigger of frustration, or impatience as a sign that a question needs to be asked.

Try that trick and let me know what happens.  My June 5th newsletter article has examples on how to best use questions in your personal, professional and entrepreneurial roles.  Quickly subscribe to my weekly newsletter at http://eepurl.com/cZ9_-/  to get that edition.

If you liked this tips, more can be found at www.lauraleerose.com/blog or subscribe to my weekly newsletter at http://eepurl.com/cZ9_-/

The weekly newsletter contains tips on:

  1. Time management
  2. Career maintenance
  3. Business networking
  4. Work life balance strategies

If you haven’t taken advantage of your introductory time management coaching session, please contact LauraRose@RoseCoaching.info

 

Networking Dilemma: The Net Taker

As a success and business coach, I received the following question:

  • There is a person in your network who is smart, reliable and competent at what they do – providing a service that is highly specialized with few (if any) reliable competitors.
  • Over the years, you have referred this person many great clients and this person has always thanked you for this business. Further, without exception, the people you have referred have been ecstatic with the price and quality of service this person has provided, which reflects well on you.
  • The problem is that even though this person’s clients (and other contacts) could be great clients for you, this person has never referred you anyone. Not one. Never!
  • You have talked with this person about this and they openly acknowledge the lack of reciprocity. They assures you that it is nothing personal. This person does not refer anyone, as they simply have a personal policy against referring clients or making any referrals (of any sort) in general.

I recommended the following — but what would you have said?

Your first priority is to your client. If this “net taker” is truly the best person for your client’s situation, then focus on your client’s needs and go ahead and recommend the best person for their situation (until your find a suitable replacement). This way you are doing right by your important client or potential client.

In the meantime, continue to network with others that are expert in the “net taker’s” domain. When you find someone comparable with even more positive attributes, then you can confidently guide your clients appropriately.

Recognize that you have full control of this situation by finding other comparable experts. This “net taker” is not the only expert in their field. I recommend having an open conversation by saying “Mr/Ms X, I totally understand your positions and I want to continue to be sensitive to your principles. You are a dear friend and I value our relationship. In addition, I want to collaborate with someone of your caliber that is open to referral and recommendation reciprocation. I was wondering if you can help me in my goal. Who are your competitors? Who do you feel have similar expertise and is comfortable in reciprocating?” In this manner, you are telling them that your are openly looking for a replacement in your network for his/her position.

You are not trying to sway them in their principles, but you are being forthright in your decision to find a better referral match to your business goals. And there is nothing wrong with that.

5 Tips for managing cultural or process change in the workplace

 “When the student is ready, the teacher will appear”

Buddhist proverb

The most effective way to lead and mentor, is when the student is wanting or asking. An inherent problem occurs when you are mentoring or leading groups (such as in a corporation). Often times a company, division or department will adopt a new process or software life cycle method without regard to the culture or readiness of the employees. This creates a frustrating and possibly a “no-Win” position for anyone responsible for auditing or managing this process change.

Sometimes when people are having trouble with change, it is because they are not ready for the change. Forcing them in a direction that they are not ready for is more difficult than merely allowing them the time to adjust and continue to lead them in that direction. Allowing and recognizing the stages of acceptance are also important (see 10 Tips for dealing with change in the workplace for more information).

Some additional points to consider when leading folks toward a new culture, development lifecycle method or process:

  1. Acknowledge that it isn’t your responsibility to ‘force’ everyone to adapt to the change.
  2.  Share reason for the process change
  3. Celebrate even the smallest process successes.
  4. Ask for help
  5.  Lead by example

Read the full article at :

www.lauraleerose.com/5 Tips for managing process change in the workplace.pdf

Which superhero are you?

With adversity comes super-human strength and determination.
Over the rainy weekend, I watched The Fantastic Four (a movie about 4 comic book superheroes). While watching it, it occurred to me that we possess those same inner powers.

• We have Mr. Fantastic’s ability to stretch and reach beyond what we ordinarily expect from ourselves.
• We have the Invisible Woman’s ability to telepathically send energy waves and vibrations toward other so either repel or protect.
• We have Thing’s extra ordinary strength and determination in the face of danger.
• We have the Human Touch’s has extraordinary fire and passion for things that align with our purpose.

What other comic book heroes do you align with, when called to inspired action?

Wouldn’t it be nice to have an alter-ego to call upon, to help us take that next leap?

We all have it within us.  What if we deliberately wore our superhero alter-ego to get us over that next speed bump?

What would happen?